It's so abnormal.

I have been home for four days now and I can say for certain I am still in huge reverse culture shock. Both physically and mentally. Although I do have more hope for my body to recover much faster than my mind. It is so weird to feel this way. I almost cannot bear it. I am so very happy to be home don't get me wrong. I love seeing my family and my work family. I truly enjoy story time of the things God did through me while I was there and hugs from my mommy. There is something missing though. The longing is so real. It is like a constant state of longing for my future. A longing to embrace children who have never been loved. A longing to bring hope to a family who has none. A longing to be a missionary every single day for the rest of my life.
This longing and desire that is so evident in my heart just pushes me I suppose. It pushes me to look at my school as my mission field for the last year I am so privileged to spend there. It pushes me to do every single thing I do to the glory of God.
That is a job.
I can't wait until I call a place like Guatemala or Honduras or anywhere for that matter home. Until I call an orphanage, clinic, school or wherever I am called to my home. It's definitely nerve-racking and almost makes me anxious but, my heart will be so full.
But, for now I will enjoy being home. I will enjoy the nex few weeks with a great friend that is leaving. I will also choose to embrace the fact that I have no control over that. I will also enjoy not knowing what comes next in my life. Guatemala is in October... That's about all I'm 100% sure of. God holds me in His hands... Another thing I'm sure of.. He's got this. 

Location: Waverly Delta Township

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